The Results are in and Your
CYCLE-BREAKING Super Power is:
empathy
You are an understanding, adaptable, intuitive, make EVERYONE FEEL WELCOME kind of person. You don’t need to be in the limelight and you care about others feeling seen and heard. You value hearing other people’s feelings, even when it’s uncomfortable. Rather than reacting defensively, you are great at asking questions and digging in.
But constantly caring for others can leave you feeling unseen or unheard. The tender care you offer others doesn’t always come back in return. Your relentless pursuit of propping others up can leave you wondering, “Does anyone care about me?” “Caring enough” hasn’t healed your family as much as you would have hoped, and you aren’t sure you have much left to give. You’re ready to add yourself to the list of people you care deeply about…
“It’s time to give a voice to all the stories you hold—a voice that both can recognize all you’ve been through and is also committed to speaking hope over your future. It is possible for your legacy to pass on to the next generation with less pain than the one you inherited.”
— Kristen Hallinan, Legacy Changer
How did You develop the superpower of empathy?
IN your family, you played the role of:
The chameleon
Although you don’t care for the spotlight yourself, you can’t stand for someone else to feel overlooked—and that’s where you come in. Oftentimes, you are willing to sit and listen to the hard truths that others want to avoid. You feel deeply, which means the pain in your family can often feel magnified and overwhelming. You’ve often thought, maybe all your tender care of others would lead to you finally feeling peaceful in your own heart…
If we were sitting down for coffee, I would tell you…
You will never feel truly loved until you feel truly known.
If you could hold up a mirror and see yourself the way God sees you, you would see his special possession—his beloved child that he created on purpose. In order to feel truly loved and cared for ourselves, we must be willing to give others the opportunity to truly know us. It might be scary at first—but the freedom that follows is worth it!
You are not defined by your past.
The best is yet to come for you and your family. It’s never too late to figure out who you are. Embracing your unique gifts will strengthen your ability to break unhealthy generational cycles that have continued on for far too long. Your ability to hold hard things and stay present with others is going to change the legacy you pass down to the next generation.
The way God uniquely gifted you matters.
Your personality, gifts, quirks, and passions are all to be celebrated. Your family, friends, and community need the contribution of your gifts to reach their potential. Focus on what heals your heart, gives you life, and walks you closer to what God has called you to.
Before we get too far into this…
MEET THE AUTHOR:
I’M KRISTEN HALLINAN
I’m the girl who came from a chaotic childhood, but you’d never know it because I was so put together on the outside. For too long, I thought I could breeze past my past, using my hard work ethic and quick wit to force a perfect future into fruition. As it turns out, that’s not exactly how it works.
As a wife and mom of four strong-willed, joy-filled kids, I found myself reacting out of pain from the past all too often. These behaviors scared me, and I knew it was time to do something about it.
I’ve spent the last five years healing from wounds of my past, rediscovering my story, figuring out who God says I am, and putting new practices into place so I can pass a changed, healthier legacy onto my children.
The legacy we inherit doesn’t have to be the legacy we pass on. It is possible to break the cycle, and God wants to redeem your story.
Today, I help Legacy Changers heal their hurts, let God redeem their story, and create hope for their families.
LEgacy Changer
Heal the Hurt, Redeem Your Story, Create Hope for Your Family
Do you feel stuck in cycles of brokenness? Many of us unknowingly repeat the mistakes of our parents and grandparents, passing on pain and suffering to the next generation. No matter what has happened in the past or what mess you might be in today, you are not destined to carry on your family’s wounds, unhealthy behaviors, or toxic relationships. It doesn’t have to be this way. Your legacy can be different and the change starts with you.
***Legacy Changer releases 02.20.24
YOUR NEXT STEPS
Make a list of things that are unique about you (it’s okay if they are different from the rest of your family).
Practice listening to someone else’s problem without sacrificing your own beliefs and values. What does it look like to hold this tension?
Be on the lookout for an email soon with more about what EMPATHY looks like when you are healing from the past and creating a new, healthier legacy.
CHILDHOOD NEEDS
Did you know every child has 13 needs that should be met by their parents or caregivers? Very Few of us have every need met, AND unmet needs have an impact.
“Legacies passed down from generation to generation consist of both what took place in a family as well as what didn’t.”
- Kristen Hallinan, Legacy Changer
As THE chameleon,
The needs that may not have been met in your childhood include:
Individual Agency—When a child isn’t allowed to express feelings, unique opinions, and make their own choices, it is difficult to develop these skills as an adult.
Holy Identity—Doing our best to disappear clouds our ability to know who we are in Christ. Parents should hold up a mirror of God-given identity to their children, celebrating the way they were uniquely created.
Values, Morals, and Faith—Constantly adapting to accommodate the comfort of others requires a sacrifice of your own belief system. It’s possible that values in your family of origin were either overlooked or presented in an overly domineering manner that caused you to turn the other way.
Interested in learning more?
Legacy Changer will help you to:
Understand the brain and body science of emotional wounds
Heal from generational pain
Rediscover your story
Set boundaries in your relationships—the way Jesus did.
Create hope for your family
