The Results are in and Your
CYCLE-BREAKING Super Power is:
blazing your own trail
You are an independent thinker, MARCH TO THE BEAT OF YOUR OWN DRUM kind of person. You aren’t afraid to be yourself, embracing your own thoughts and opinions. You know how to speak up—and can use your voice to set boundaries, protect others, and redefine relationships in your family.
But constantly staying true to yourself has cost you within your family. You are tired of others treating you like an outcast—or even placing undue blame on you. The picture your family paints of you never seems to change, and you aren’t sure you can keep repeating these cycles of pain much longer. You’re ready to set boundaries and pioneer a new trail…
“It’s time to give a voice to all the stories you hold—a voice that both can recognize all you’ve been through and is also committed to speaking hope over your future. It is possible for your legacy to pass on to the next generation with less pain than the one you inherited.”
— Kristen Hallinan, Legacy Changer
How did You develop the superpower
of Blazing your own trail?
IN your family, you played the role of:
The scapegoat
For as long as you can remember, you’ve felt like an outsider to your family. You are willing to stay true to yourself despite the rejection you might face. Others haven’t shown up for you the way you have hoped, causing you to become more and more independent. You’ve often wished their behavior would improve over time, but nothing ever seems to change. You long to create a different environment in your own family…
If we were sitting down for coffee, I would tell you…
God is the only one who gets to decide who you are.
No matter what others might have said about you, God celebrates your uniqueness! If you could hold up a mirror and see yourself the way God sees you, you would see his special possession—his beloved child that he created on purpose. Your worth isn’t found in what other people have to say. You were created by God—and only he gets to define who you are.
You are not defined by your past.
God is the God of new names—and he has called you free, victorious, and loved. The best is yet to come for you and your family. In using your voice to advocate for yourself and your loved ones, you have the power to break unhealthy generational cycles that have continued on for far too long. Your grit and tenacity are going to change the legacy you pass down to the next generation.
Hurt People Hurt People.
Take a deep breath, and exhale out all of the unking or untrue messages you’ve received. The pain that has been passed on to you is a reflection of others’ pain—not a reflection of you. You have the incredible opportunity—and responsibility—to heal and pioneer a new dynamic for your own family.
Before we get too far into this…
MEET THE AUTHOR:
I’M KRISTEN HALLINAN
I’m the girl who came from a chaotic childhood, but you’d never know it because I was so put together on the outside. For too long, I thought I could breeze past my past, using my hard work ethic and quick wit to force a perfect future into fruition. As it turns out, that’s not exactly how it works.
As a wife and mom of four strong-willed, joy-filled kids, I found myself reacting out of pain from the past all too often. These behaviors scared me, and I knew it was time to do something about it.
I’ve spent the last five years healing from wounds of my past, rediscovering my story, figuring out who God says I am, and putting new practices into place so I can pass a changed, healthier legacy onto my children.
The legacy we inherit doesn’t have to be the legacy we pass on. It is possible to break the cycle, and God wants to redeem your story.
Today, I help Legacy Changers heal their hurts, let God redeem their story, and create hope for their families.
LEgacy Changer
Heal the Hurt, Redeem Your Story, Create Hope for Your Family
Do you feel stuck in cycles of brokenness? Many of us unknowingly repeat the mistakes of our parents and grandparents, passing on pain and suffering to the next generation. No matter what has happened in the past or what mess you might be in today, you are not destined to carry on your family’s wounds, unhealthy behaviors, or toxic relationships. It doesn’t have to be this way. Your legacy can be different and the change starts with you.
***Legacy Changer releases 02.20.24
YOUR NEXT STEPS
Make a list of 10 strengths, remembering these next time you are made to feel less than.
Write down a short script that you will say the next time you are unrightfully blamed or put down, following this pattern: acknowledge your hurt, set a boundary, remind your family member you want respect and love to flow two ways.
Be on the lookout for an email soon with more about what BLAZING YOUR OWN TRAIL looks like when you are healing from the past and creating a new, healthier legacy.
CHILDHOOD NEEDS
Did you know every child has 13 needs that should be met by their parents or caregivers? Very Few of us have every need met, AND unmet needs have an impact.
“Legacies passed down from generation to generation consist of both what took place in a family as well as what didn’t.”
- Kristen Hallinan, Legacy Changer
As THE scapegoat,
The needs that may not have been met in your childhood include:
Modeling—Skills such as forgiveness, tolerance, and respect of boundaries were not modeled for you. When you miss out on this in childhood, you must be intentional to develop these skills as an adult.
Community—Rather than feeling a connection to your family as a whole, you were made to feel like an outsider. You didn’t experience what it’s like to depend on others or work together.
Celebration—Rather than embracing your unique quirks, interests, and gifts, you were made to feel less than for your differences. Celebration may feel foreign and awkward, but with practice, you can learn to incorporate celebration into your life now.
Interested in learning more?
Legacy Changer will help you to:
Understand the brain and body science of emotional wounds
Heal from generational pain
Rediscover your story
Set boundaries in your relationships—the way Jesus did.
Create hope for your family
